you may wonder what this is. well, it is the complete history of the world and also the universe. or at least the solar system. today we are thinking big.
the solar system has arrived in our kitchen. it was a christmas present from mrs prof to herself. mrs prof likes to get herself presents that keep her busy so as to keep her out of mischief. the sort of mischief that herself is capable of over the christmas period has to be seen to be believed. she is not someone who does the sitting around chatting thing all that well. so by boxing day she has designed some mad project which will not only go wrong but which will involve everyone else in the chaos too.
however the solar system has proved a challenge. this is not unrelated to the fact that herself has managed to lose the instructions. i suspect this was when there was a massive cull of wrapping paper after the presents were opened. herself has also lost her camera case with a memory chip in it which probably went the same way.
so the solar system has been put together with scant regard to which planet goes where, with the added problem that herself ran out of twine so some planets have ended up rather too near each other or, more seriously, too near the sun.
anyway tonight herself was in need of a bit of company so while himself was making the tea (he is the only one with any culinary skills in this household, as regular readers will be aware) herself sat at the table putting the finishing touches to the planets. then it was time to hang them from the ceiling.
there was something horribly inevitable about what happened next. the planets hang from a criss cross of poles. it appears even to a humble lurcher that there is a need for balance in such an arrangement (there is no point in going all buddhist on me - i am talking simple physics here) and because of the loss of the instructions this was not possible. himself started to curse mrs prof. herself was more philosophical. "this is just how it is in real life" she said. " just when you think you have it all levelled out it goes skewiff again".
"and what of the book?" i hear you ask. well himself was visited at work by a bookselling person who sold him all the secrets of world history for £15. i am not sure what this says about world history. maybe it is not worth the paper it is written on?