a little light relief

its nice to know that, even in the midst of such stressy times, the peeps still retain a sense of fun. yesterday evening provided ample evidence of this. we are at the time of year when herself's optimism about the coming of spring means that we run out of coal and wood before the weather is warm enough to dispense with the fire. in past years the problem has been solved by popping out to a petrol station and purchasing bags of logs and coal to tide us over until the warm weather. the combination of being about to move and having no money has led to a more inventive approach.

a few days ago found herself and my boy dismantling a rotting garden bench with a jemmy and a bowsaw. the resulting wood has kept the place warm for most of the week but last night herself had to venture out to chop up the remaining bits of the bench. just as she made a start the heavens opened and hail rained down, challenging even herself's optimsim. cutting the wood in a hurry meant that when it came to insert it into the wood-burner, nearly every bit was a tiny bit to long to get the door shut. this only became apparent after said wood had already started to catch fire. so we started our evening with the room full of smoke from the smouldering bits of bench in the grate, with herself trying to remedy the situation using a hammer and screwdriver.

things carried on in the same vein. himself went to bed early, as he is feeling very poorly with a cough. but he was rougher still later on and emerged to throw up. my boy has a fear of vomit and ran into his room and shut the door. himself tried to go in to explain that it was the kidneys and that my boy wouldn't catch germs but my boy held the door shut from inside. the standoff continued for a few minutes but himself eventually crawled off to bed. my lady friend and i were exhausted by all this and breathed a sigh of relief when herself and my boy went to bed.

silence reigned for about 5 minutes. then a loud banging erupted. my lady friend and i leapt out of bed and ran around barking. herself was dozing off. she had been awake for most of the previous night and was exhausted. but no-one can sleep through loud banging and two lurchers careering around barking so she groaned and got up again. the banging was coming from my boy's room. herself quickly established that he was locked in, a fact which had become apparent when he got up for a pee. the battle to keep out the germs had somehow got the door stuck. herself got her toolbox and started to dismantle the handle but it became apparent that the problem would not be easy to resolve. luckily my boy takes this sort of thing in his stride, having grown up with the peeps as parents. the porch window is at right angles to the window in my boy's room. so herself passed the screwdriver through to my boy so he could dismantle the handle from his side. but although removing the handles meant herself and my boy could see each other through the hole, it made no impression on the recalcitrant door.

by now herself was dropping with exhaustion so she told my boy to collect bertha the bear and to climb out through the window. although the house is a bungalow it is quite high up at the front. but luckily under my boy's window is a shed which used to house geese (the geese were a gay couple called gilbert and george who eventually were eaten by the fox so the shed now houses the lawnmower). my boy passed bertha the bear and his pillow through the window and then climbed across. luckily the hail had abated by this point. my boy bedded down on the sofa, cuddling bertha the bear, who has seen a lot of this sort of thing during her life so is unphased by being passed through a window in the middle of the night.

this morning herself has to somehow gain entry to my boy's room so he can get his clothes before going to the youth club. at least this practical problem it will take her mind off the house business...