Thursday, August 16, 2007

economy

herself is still off work. it is beginning to tell on himself and my boy. herself likes to keep busy and the economy drive has given her plenty of scope for busyness. today she was caught by my boy looking at a website about designing your own clothes. he scuttled off to share this with himself.

"i am not wearing a smock!" exploded himself.

"who said i was planning on making clothes for you?" she replied. himself reminded her of some of her less successful projects. there was the suit made of curtains that she wore to a wedding. it was much admired until she let the cat (wash my mouth out with soap) out of the bag and told people the fabric used to grace a window. the bride and groom became decidedly huffy.

"and don't forget your venture into upholstery!" himself continued. it has to be said that this was not one of her better ideas. the peeps had been given an old armchair by a friend. it was badly in need of repair. herself went to the library and got out a book about upholstery, then purchased various frightening-looking tools. during the project mrs prof happened to visit. she tried out the chair, still in its undergarments, with one or two springs sticking out.

"ooh! its an orgasmatron!" she squealed. i am not sure what one of these is but it made her smile.

my boy has been spending his time on holiday from school arranging his collection of weapons. his contribution to the economy drive was suggesting that the peeps took up armed robbery. today he spent a happy hour working on a powerpoint presentation. herself lent him her laptop for this, thinking it would be good for him to practice spelling and layout. when my boy called the peeps in to see his presentation they were a little alarmed. it was called 'terrorist training programme - your guide to becoming a successful and wealthy terrorist'.

"i'm not that wild about my work laptop having stuff like that on it," said herself, "if i get the sack we will be even worse off."

"don't worry,"said my boy, "i've saved it as 'fluffy bunnies' so no-one will guess what it is. "

there was a lull in activity last week as grandma was visiting. she arrived with the news that she had left my boy's uncle martin at home as he was recovering from an operation on his hand. grandma went on to explain that when uncle martin had been having his operation the nurse had asked him if he took recreational drugs. "only nurofen," he replied.

"i bet he's having a party!" said my boy, "he'll probably hire a hooker!" i thought at first that this was a reference to the character in peter pan, but i fear not...

6 comments:

deb said...

At least your life is never boring:)

flutter said...

You are hilarious.

jen said...

what is wrong with smocks? smocks are people too.

Tabba said...

my sides ache from laughing so hard!!

Aliki2006 said...

Tabba recommended I check you out, as we might have two kindred spirits in our boys...

I'm enjoying your writing!

Rion said...

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